Some writings from October (warning: long)

October 11, 2006

So, boredom for me leads to writing and a test of your endurance to read my ramblings.

I had the day off work today because a friend of mine got married. This day off has been both relaxing and busy all the same. It's been physically relaxing but my mind has been racing all day. It's funny that when my mind is flooded with thoughts, the only one that stays firm in my mind is that I'm content. I'm not necessarily comfortable though not in despair.

My contentment has really been challenged this week with all the stuff going on in North Korea. Yes, they're doing their thing. Yes, I'm directly south of them. YES, I trust the Lord and His plan for my life. What do I think about the stuff going on? I think I need to keep my trust in the Creator, not in man. I know that I have not fulfilled the Lord's purpose for my life yet, and until He does, I'll be here on earth. It doesn't matter where I will be; when the Lord says my time is up, it's done. I am essentially at more risk every day when I cross the road here or when I get in a vehicle here.

More thoughts…talking to parents. What a crazy concept. There's been a lot of that in the past week. All good.

Plane tickets… Got that taken care of, but not in the times that we would have liked. The greatest part of that though is that we do indeed have tickets. Matt and I are meeting the families at Christmas. Bring it.

School = job = work. I'm a little behind where I would like to be, but that happens. I'm doing much better this year than I did last year with it though. Christina and I begin our discipleship group on Friday, Life After High School. It should be interesting. I'm hoping that we'll be able to answer most of the questions that the kids have from the Christian perspective. I'm also hoping that the experiences that Chris and I share will help impact the kids in a way where they will avoid the stupid stuff that we weren't able to and life fully for Christ.

I'm very content with my situation at the moment. The Lord has me in a period of waiting for certain things, but that is only making them stronger. I'm constantly learning about the godly woman and what it means to live like a godly woman (which I pray never ceases).

So, with a partially cleared head I must get to grading.

Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am.

Philippians 4:11

October 24, 2006 These are just some verses that have been hitting home lately. These have been a real comfort to me to reassure me that the freedom in my life the Lord has given me is SO much better than the bondage that I was in before.

These are all from the book of Proverbs:

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction. 1:7

My son, do not walk in the way with them [the world]. Keep your feet from their path, for their feet run to evil and they hasten to shed blood. Indeed, it is useless to spread the baited net in the sight of any bird; but they lie in wait for their own blood; they ambush their own lives. 1:15-19

Do not be afraid of sudden fear nor the onslaught of the wicked when it comes; for the Lord will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being caught. 3:25-26

Do not enter the path of the wicked and do not proceed in the way of evil men. Avoid it , do not pass by it; turn away from it and pass on. 4:14-15

Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life. 4:23

He who walks in integrity walks securely, but he who perverts his ways will be found out. 10:9

Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all trangressions. 10:12

Doing wickedness is like a sport to a fool, and so is wisdom to a man of understanding. What the wicked fears will come upon him, but the desire of the righteous will be granted. 10:23-24

The fear of the Lord prolongs life, but the years of the wicked will be shortened. 10:27

The way of the fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man is he who listens to counsel. 12:15 (I wish I would have learned this one before I had to be the fool.)

The righteous is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked leads them astray. 12:26

He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm. Adversity persues sinners, but the righteous will be rewarded with prosperity. 13:20-21

He who is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who is quick tempered exalts folly. 14:29

The way of the wicked is an abomination to the Lord, but He loves one who persues righteousness. 15:9

Better is a little with the fear of the Lord, than great treasure and turmoil with it. 15:16

Better is a little with righteousness than great income with injustice. 16:8

As I was typing the last blog, a few verses stuck out again to me and they need greater emphasis than just being typed out. Better is a little with the fear of the Lord, than great treasure and turmiol with it. 15:16 Better is a little with righteousness than great income with injustice. 16:8

Why might these stick out a little more than others? Why would these verses speak to me specifically?

Because at one point, my priorities were totally backwards. At one point I didn't trust the Lord to provide for my needs because I thought I could do it on my own. I thought I had my future all planned out and it would be like a modern day fairy tale.

Riches sound nice. The thought of being well off sounds nice too, but it's not everything. It's not worth it if you're sacrificing your beiliefs, values, family, friends, God. It is NOT worth it.

Satan tries to get us to flee from God the minute we become a believer. He puts a stumbling block in front of the complacent. He feeds doubts to the doubter. lies to the vacillating, wispers in the ear of the wanderer.

I, for one, am thankful that the Lord is bigger than all of that. He can take us from a situation where we think we have it all figured out and put us where we need to be.

He has taken me from a place where I thought I had my life all planned out, which did not include Him (which was dumb) to a life of servitude. I was fooled into thinking that in my situation I would have comfort in my earthly riches and could live life apart from Him. Thankfully, he has taken me from that situation, changed my outlook and is providing for me in more ways than I could have ever imagined.

The Lord is the only true source of happiness. I was miserable in what I thought was the ideal situation. The Lord has shown me what the ideal situation really is, what it really means to live the fulfilled life. There is no greater satisfaction than to live for the Lord. One must die daily to themselves to live for God.



October 26, 2006
So I'm really struggling tonight to be patient in the areas where the Lord has told me to wait. Sometimes it's so stinkin difficult to listen to God. Eventhough I know what is best -listening to God- I still want to do my own thing.

The Lord's timing is perfect. We don't wait on Him; we wait with Him. We wait with Him because His timing is perfect. If we were merely waiting on him that would imply that we do not really believe that all things work out for good for those who believe in Him.

Why is it that it's often the times that we wait that get us in the most trouble? Why is it so difficult to be content even though we know God has things under control?

I know the Lord will work everything out in His time. I have faith in that, and I believe that, but it gets so hard sometimes. I am by nature a very impatient person which makes times of waiting so difficult. I have to keep reminding myself that there is indeed a blessing in waiting on the Lord's timing, and that things will turn out sweeter and far better than I could have ever imagined in the end.

Praise the Lord for the final result. Praise the Lord for the lessons we learn while we wait with Him.

So much for clearing my head...

Sigh...


Here's a really cute picture of Matt and I too. A little something to make you smile since you've made it this far.